How Middle Age Allows Us to Be Calm
How many changes have occurred in your life in the last year? Do you ever have the feeling you would just like the world to stop for a few minutes so you can catch your breath? There have been so many changes in my life in the last 18 months that sometimes I just want to take a break from it all.
In the last year and a half my husband had heart ablation surgery, my twin daughters graduated from high school, my husband was hit by a car on his birthday while riding his bike, my mother died, our dog had three surgeries, we are downsizing and put our house on the market and bought a smaller house. Whew!
If all these life changing events had happened a few years ago, I would have collapsed underneath all of the trauma and events. So how did I keep my sanity? My husband, family, girlfriends, a strong personal spiritual practice, yoga, tai chi and a little bit of red wine.
As I get older, I have a little more resilience and tenacity. I am more willing to ask for help and I can put things into the long hall perspective. It wasn’t any one skill or resource that saved me, it was all of them.
A few things that you can put in your tool box to help you weather the winds of change in your life:
- Find Your Ground – Develop a personal renewal practice that allows you to download the stress of the day and start each day fresh and calm. This can include, journaling, a daily walk, gratitude practice, inspirational reading and some form of physical movement – yoga, tai chi, Qigong, etc. When these practices are practiced daily they help you be more strong and calm and less anxious. Even five to ten minutes a day of your personal quiet time can yield great results.
- Use Your Network – Family and friends build strength into our lives because we know that we can call on them when we need a little tea and sympathy. The key is to call on our support network. It takes greater strength to reach out for help than it does to hide and isolate. Assume that these people want to help you. After all, most of the time when someone asks you for help, what do you say?
Let me know what you do to maintain your sense of balance when the winds of change start blowing. We can’t stop the changes, we can only respond with wisdom and grace or with impatience and anxiety. I look forward to hearing from all of you wise readers.
If you would like to explore the wisdom and beauty that life’s changes offer in a supportive group, contact me about my ongoing Women’s Group.